The Worst Month of My Life

I normally love the month of February.  It starts with Valentine's Day, which for a romantic like me,  is a really big deal.  To be sure, Valentine's Day is the beginning of my birthday celebration.  The celebration begins with some romantic time with the She-wolf and culminates with my family lavishly adoring me 10 days later on my actual birthday.  What's not to like about this month?

Well, this year everything was ruined by my mother's foray to Thailand to visit my nephew, Rocky.  She is remarkable for her age (she will turn 84 this year).  While in Thailand pictures of her began to surface on the internet with the caption "Remarkable 84 year old woman rides an elephant, and tames a tiger."  Or was it "Tames an elephant and rides a tiger?"  Or does it really even matter?  My friends, began asking, "Dude, I saw your mom taming a tiger?  She's amazing!"  or "Smart I saw your mom in Thailand,  I think she was riding a shark?  It's sad you don't have what it takes to keep up with your mother."

Yes, I normally look forward to my birthday.  During my birthday celebration, one of my kids typically asks to me to regale the family with a story from one of my excellent adventures.  Instead, this year I'm probably going to hear: "Dad, what do you think Grandma Smart is doing today?  Maybe we should call her and see what amazing things she's been up to recently."  The anxiety in me has been building to such an extent that I'm not even sure I want to publicly celebrate my birthday this year. When I can't even compete with an 83 year old woman, especially when this woman is my mother, life is definitely on a downward slide.  I think I'll just postpone my birthday celebration to a time when my mother is back in Salt Lake and busily engaged in more appropriate geriatric activities such as temple work, genealogy and meetings with the Daughters of the Utah Pioneers.