Monday, September 12, 2011

A Little Confession

This past summer, before Nick went back to school, he had to borrow my truck for some reason. Allegedly, when he started up my rig a Justin Beiber song was blaring on my radio. Apparently, the last person who had driven my truck was blasting some serious Beiber Fever on my I-Pod, which was playing through my radio. At least, that's the allegation of one of my former, favorite sons-in-law. At first, I tried vehemently to deny that I had driven my truck last, but Nick wouldn't let it go. He meticulously established that I had, in fact, driven the truck last, AND that it was, in fact, I who had been listening to the Beibster at about 180 decibels, which is the sound level emitted by a military jet on take-off.

In the end, I had to finally admit that it was me that had last driven the truck AND that, indeed, it was me that had been rocking out to a Justin Beiber tune. This was extremely difficult given my tough guy image. I pretty much only listen to classic rock, jazz and Irish folk tunes. Well at least that's what I want people to believe. Now that my cover is blown, I'm just going to admit it on the vasty deep that is the world wide web, I have occasionally rocked out with the Beibster.

I don't know if it's the Beibster's Canadian roots, or the fact that he writes his own music, or the simple fact that he is an amazing musical talent. Whatever the reason, its true that I like a couple of his songs . It is untrue that I have a special Justin Beiber playlist on my I-Pod, entitled Beiber Fever (someone would have to get their hands on my I-Pod to prove this fact). Also, the reports circulating that I have some JB lyrics memorized is also grossly exaggerated. (Well, at least Nick will never be able to prove this little fact.) At any rate, suffice it to say, that I have listened to him occasionally.

When Lil' D left for school, she took with her the lifesize effigy of the Beibster that is shown in the picture above. Our family enjoyed having Justin hang out with us in the kitchen every day. Typically, the first face to greet me every morning for breakfast was Justin's. His face was also the first to greet me when I came through the door after a long day of work. Because of this, it was tough to see him leave for BYU. However, before anyone creeps out too much, please know that I also am really missing Lil' D.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Drive it like you Stole It, Baby!

I must apologize to my faithful worldwide readership about my 6 month hiatus from the blogosphere. However, in my defense, I have just completed an insanely busy summer. So, now that I am in Europe relaxing with Sheila, I have found some leisure time to get reacquainted with my laptop.

Now most of you know that my wife frequently refers to me as "Handsome Rob." "Handsome Rob" was the character played by Jason Statham in the movie The Italian Job. I believe this moniker applies to me on multiple levels. First, is my most excellent hair-cut, which is as tight, if not tighter than Esq. Statham's. Second, is my physique...Okay, so that's a slight exaggeration. Next, are my peerless driving skills. Some of you might remember Sr. Statham's role in theTransporter movies. Now everything about me that causes my wife to think "Handsome Rob" was brought to light this past week when we decided to rent a car and drive north to Scotland, Stratford on Avon, Warwick Castle, etc. The first turn out of the rental car agency was straight into oncoming traffic with me driving in the wrong lane. Things got a little crazy for few seconds because I struggled to find Reverse in my stylish Peugot 207. I finally got us turned around and things mostly went well, except for that time I went the wrong direction on a round-about. Oops! To say that this experience caused a wee bit of anxiety would be a gross understatement. Regardless of my lack of adequate driving skills, my total absence of Hollywood good looks, and my "Big Ab" that has replaced my erstwhile six pack, my wife seemed mildly impressed with my abilities to transport us safely the length and breadth of the UK. Well, at least she was appreciative that we were able to get from Point A to Point B and sundry other destinations. This week's UK Tour has included the following highlights:

1. Getting Chelsea set up in her London flat;
2. Touring The University of London;
3. Visiting the birthplace and home of Sheila's Grandpa Hague in Workington;
4. Attending Sacrament meeting in Glasgow;
5. Finding the grave of my great-great-great-great-great grandparents: Williams and Sarah Smart near Leicester;
6. Hanging out in Edinburgh (maybe the coolest city I've ever been to);
7. Re-enacting the Kate and William wedding at the Westminster Abbey;
8. Eating spicy Indian food;
9. Rocking out to Scottish Rock;
10. Visiting the Warwick Castle.

Tomorrow after we do the London Tower, we leave for Switzerland to hang out with Rocky and Sarah Smart. By the way, if the Swiss are crazy enough to rent me a car, I hope they don't realize that my motto while driving in Europe is "Drive it like you Stole it, Baby!"

"Handsome Rob" at the wheel probably driving down the wrong side of the road. Apparently, my jaunty English driving cap did not actually help me drive any better.

The Warwick Castle.
Windsor Castle.

Grave of William and Sarah Smart, my great-great-great-great grandparents.

Edinburgh Castle.

My introduction to the Queen Mum.

Sheila and Chelsea at the home where her Grandpa Hague was born in Workington.

Me challenging William Wallace.